Nathan Kearney

So, I’m Nathan. People call me Kearn, Kearnel, Tripod… Kearndog. I don’t know why. I think once you get more than two nicknames, people just start making noises and hoping you respond. My hero’s Ronnie O’Sullivan. The man plays snooker like he’s trying to finish early to get to the pub before it shuts. I respect that, as a man who also likes to get to the pub before it shuts. I’ve got two dogs. French Pointers. One’s 15, the other’s 8. They’re mother and daughter, They’re the only living beings who consistently listen to me, and even then, only if I’m holding chicken. Aside from chicken, I like steak. Medium-rare, bearnaise sauce. It’s the nuts. Couple that with a pint of milk. Cold. Straight from the fridge. Like a man who’s just given up or just getting started. Hard to tell. Either way, I feel like a king. One other thing you should know, I lose things constantly. Keys, phone, dignity. I once lost a hat I was wearing. True story.

Anyway, that’s me. Nathan. Nice to meet you.